Saturday, February 25, 2006

Move along now...

Call me naive, stupid, big-headed, proud, whatever. But I feel like a love lost is well...a love lost.

It pains me to hear people I care about moping around about a lost love and how they want to end their lives because of it. Please, get a grip, y'all. Okay, some may say that I have not felt a lost love because I was never in a relationship before. How would you know? I have had my fair share of heartaches. Yes, I do know how painful it can be but never have I come to a point of wanting to end my life for the one who broke my heart. Never! Insya ALLAH, I never will. It may seem unlikely (especially at when you're at your lowest) but really, there is so much to live for. Life doesn't end just because he/she doesn't reciprocate your love.

Please don't get me wrong. This post is not to say that my wonderful friends can't come to me for their relationship problems. They can and they know it. But this post is to say how much it hurts me to see them in so much emotional pain - because I know how it feels.

Yes, you can grief. I know I did. I let myself cry. Cry my heart out. It felt good afterwards. After grieving comes the reflection stage. I then started to reflect on the wrongs and rights that I did during the whole process.

Did I make any efforts to rectify the problem/s?
Did he/she make the same efforts that I had put in?
What can I learn from this?

Some of us may want to know from the other party the real reason for the change of heart (or is it all of us?) But sometimes, we forget to reflect on the things he/she said or did because the answer can be found there. We get so caught up in trying to get them to explain to us and shout out that one-million dollar answer to our face. But not everyone handle things the same way we do. If you are the sort who talk things over or the type who come clean and clarify any misunderstandings and settle the problems like civilised individuals, you can't expect everyone to be like that. You are putting yourself up for the greatest dissappointment because we are all different. It's hard to find a partner who is similar in that sense but it's not impossible. He/she could be just right in front of you! You just have to look a little closer.

So my dearest friends, you know I care about you guys so much. Please don't dampen your growth and potential for a lost love. Sometimes, you just have to let go and move on. I'm not saying that it's simple but you can do it. It doesn't matter whether the relationship lasted 5 years, 5 months or even 5 days. You have to let it go. If it comes back to you, you know it's meant to be yours. If it doesn't, ALLAH will certainly replace it with something else - most of the time, it's something better. He will never leave us by ourselves no matter how often we forget Him. So live your life and be the very best that you can. I have faith in all of you. You can make it in life. Insya ALLAH.

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