I have finally made up my mind. I will accept the offer at the other centre. But I am afraid. I love teaching, no doubt about it. But I am so afraid. Afraid that I will stop halfway through my journey. Afraid that I will stop trying once I encounter any problems. Afraid that I will get sick of it all, give up and have to start afresh again - from scratch. I do not want that. I am so, so afraid. But I prayed the other day for ALLAH to show me which career path I should take and I remember very clearly what I saw. The emotions as well as the thoughts that went through my mind in my dreams that night. It was so vivid. It was almost real. I know this is the career for me. But I am so afraid.
But I have to be strong. I did it once. In the past, Aunty Zana doubted me and was always making fun of me. She knew I was weak in Maths. She always challenged me to score high marks for my Maths papers but I could not do it. I failed most of the time and she won. She was always comparing me to my elder siblings and to her sons who were oh so talented and all. Well, now at least I dare to say that my highest qualification is a diploma. What about her sons? They did not even finish high school. I proved everyone wrong once. I shall do it again! I will succeed.
I will push myself and strive to turn my dreams into reality. I will one day set up my own pre-school and work towards getting my degree before I turn 32 years old. I am giving myself 10 years to do so. I WILL SUCCEED!