Virtual Saga - This is for you, Aza.

Today will be the day I am going to diss someone without any censorship. My blood is boiling. The person responsible for making me feel this way is Azhar. The Azhar ("affectionately" referred to as Aza) who goes to a local university. Anyways, I sincerely hope he will read this one day. Some of you may ask why oh why do I create this post instead of just letting him know my true feelings? Well, you see its hard to talk sense to this guy. He seldom listens. He always have something "intelligent" to respond but hey, as a human being with feelings, I understand that you do that because you too, like me, need to defend yourself so I respect that.

Anyways, I have to admit that generally, he is a great guy. (Just for the record, he is just a virtual friend. We have never met. And judging from what happen today, I don't think we will ever meet.) However, he or should I say we always seem to fight whenever we had our chats. Almost everytime we chatted, there will always be a fight regarding whatever. But today was the limit. Today was the peak.

While we were chatting today, Aza asked for my age AGAIN. That's okay because people forget. No problem there. When I jokingly replied,

"18...",

he responded by saying that he thought I was joking because I looked like I am 30 years old - complete with his fucked up smileys. I dont see that as a problem. I mean how boring life would be without laughter, right? Probably thinking that his jokes are so bloody hilarious (as if!), he continued by asking (again) how come I was younger than Dearie (Okay, I don't want to disclose my friend's name so let's call her dearie. By the way, this friend of mine was the one who introduced Aza to me.) Of course, I could have responded like this,

"You fucking blind or something, aza? Of course im fucking younger than her, u dimwit!"

But no, I chose to respond like this,

"Of course, I'm younger than her. DUH! Aza, you better nt let me meet you in person. ARGH! *angry smiley face* "

After which he chose to wonder why oh why yours truly is always so fucking mean to him. He wonders too what he had done to moi to make me always so damn fucking mean to him. WHAT?!?! Aza, you have no bloody idea how fucking mean I can be, dude.

Enough wondering, later Aza proceeds to compare me with Dearie, that dear, dear innocent friend of mine. To him, I am the devil while Dearie is such a nice girl. By this point, I felt like punching someone in the face and he was the priviliged one - if only he was in front of me. Ass! Not only was he making me confused (what the fuck did I do to you to make you say all this shit about me?), he was pissing me off to the max.

Like as if that is not enough charcoal to make me all fired up, he adds by saying,

"Yaa dun understand? nvmlah..its hard for kids to understand adults..." (This is of course after he gets it into his thick skull that I AM YOUNGER than Dearie.)

Breathe in, breathe out, Lizzie, breathe Lizzie, breathe Lizzie

So now I'm a kid? Breathe. You guys understand where all this rage is coming from? Seriously, fuck him. So what if he is going to get an engineering degree? So what if I don't wear tudung like Dearie? (By the way, he rubs in on the fact that I don't wear tudung and makes me seem like I'm the most horrible Muslimah in the entire universe just because I'm not covered up. The nerve!)

I was just damn fucked up so I said this to him,

"Aza, im very offended by what u said and i tink ure being very rude. seriously, i dun need all this from u or anyone. if im so mean to you and u dun 1a tok 2 me anymore, juz say so. ill buzz off"

Finally realising that he has stepped on the lioness's tail, he backed off by saying how he was just kidding (oh fucking bullshit!) and that orang Muslim tak baik bermusuhan apatah lagi bertengkar (Save that for next Friday's sermon, bro).

Breathe, Lizzie.

Seriously, don't these people have brains? Don't they know that they hurt people's feelings by what they say sometimes?

I am glad that he is just a virtual friend. I don't want to hate him. Mak once said that I might just end up with the boy I hate. Na 'uzubillah. So Aza, I don't hate you but please, please stop doing this to others. Or maybe you do that only to me? Well, then fuck you if so.

Mak taught me to not diss people on the Internet because you never know how he/she might just end up reading it. But seriously, I don't care. Aza, how can you say all those things to me? Jahat sangat ke aku ni sebab aku tak pakai tudung? Buruk sangat ke perangai aku ni?

I cried. I cried because I am so darn angry with all these nasty things he said to me. I know I shouldn't care about what he said because he don't know anything about me. Chats on the Internet doesn't make him a Lizzie expert. I seriously wish he would change - for the better. I hope none of you my dear friends and readers ever have to encounter such a person. Someone who can be extremely nice to you but who actually turns out to be a nerd with fangs and a selfish heart.