Monday, August 7, 2006


Does excessive workload makes one incredibly emotional?

I had my work cut out for me today.

I was up to my neck and this is NOT a complain. Frankly, I quite liked the idea of being busy as opposed to having nothing to do and wasting my time idling away.

Anyhow, I shed a tear when Kakak mmsed me a picture of Miasara smiling away with the text that read, "Mama Ija, Happy working!"

Then I cried buckets when Mum called me at the end of the day informing that she will be going to Thailand for 4 whole days.

I am emotional, don't you think?

It's something I myself cannot explain.

I feel emotional when I remember all these people because I miss them.

It's true. It's not like I'm thousands of miles away from them but by being busy, I sort of forget about them for a bit and when something happened to remind me of them, I cry because they weren't in my mind for the period of time that I was busy.

It's totally madness, I know.

That's just the way it is.

Maybe it's because I am afraid of growing up. Yes, I said it. I am afraid of growing up.

Of course, I do want to get married, have children of my own and all that but it scares me.

Life is so simple when we were young. There were less worries, less responsibilities, less pain, less pressure.

Childhood reminds me of a life filled with happiness and lots of freedom.

Don't get me wrong, I do lead a very happy life and am grateful for all that ALLAH s.w.t has bestowed upon me.

It's the pressure, I think. The pressure to find a good life partner whom you can trust and who loves you as much as you do to him, the pressure to be the best in your field of work so you can earn big bucks, the pressure to be beautiful so the opposite gender will find you attractive, the pressure to maintain a healthy relationship with your loved ones despite hectic schedule etc.

Sometimes, the pressure is too overwhelming and all you can do to lessen it is break down in tears.

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