Have you heard of the term "weekend parents"?
Well, it's basically what the name suggests.
Couples who become parents only on the weekends - which means that they will pick up their children from their caretakers only on the weekends. They will not be responsible of taking care of their children from Mondays - Fridays.
Then why have children, right?!?
Shesh!
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Surviving Parenthood
Nowadays, sleepless nights are a norm for MyBudakTapai and I.
Will we get through this difficult phase?
Insya ALLAH.
I believe we can.
When we were trying to conceive, we knew what we were getting ourselves into.
Having a child is obviously not easy.
Nobody said it was.
Well, maybe some luckybuggers ones would have it easy.
Their newborn would sleep through the night, feed well, seldom cry - you know the picture perfect life of a new parent that you mostly saw on TV but seldom happen in reality.
If you are one of those lucky ones, treasure it and be grateful. Be VERY grateful.
I wouldn't really say that we are the unlucky ones.
Because we ARE lucky.
Lucky enough that we have been granted an opportunity to experience parenthood.
With the stress of the high cost of living in Singapore, infertility is increasing.
We met and heard of so many married couples who have tried for years to concieve and are still unsuccessful.
May ALLAH bless them with children soon.
MyBudakTapai and I tried for less than a year before we received the extremely good news.
I was glad we decided to keep it a secret for the first few weeks of my pregnancy.
It felt wonderful sharing the secret with the one person whom you love and trust.
When my pregnancy reached its 2nd month, we decided to spread the news to our families and the rest is history.
The period when we were trying to conceive was pretty challenging for both of us.
I was constantly emotional and negative and the failed pregnancy test results did nothing to uplift my spirits.
Though it was just as difficult for him, MyBudakTapai was always patient and never failed to remind me to have faith in The Almighty.
I think that was what got us through.
Having faith in Our Creator was what got us out of the rut and saved our relationship.
Alhamdullillah.
So will we survive parenthood and raise religious and good-natured children?
Insya ALLAH.
We will definitely try and hope for the very best.
ALLAH will not let those who tried be by themselves - that I'm sure of.
Will we get through this difficult phase?
Insya ALLAH.
I believe we can.
When we were trying to conceive, we knew what we were getting ourselves into.
Having a child is obviously not easy.
Nobody said it was.
Well, maybe some lucky
Their newborn would sleep through the night, feed well, seldom cry - you know the picture perfect life of a new parent that you mostly saw on TV but seldom happen in reality.
If you are one of those lucky ones, treasure it and be grateful. Be VERY grateful.
I wouldn't really say that we are the unlucky ones.
Because we ARE lucky.
Lucky enough that we have been granted an opportunity to experience parenthood.
With the stress of the high cost of living in Singapore, infertility is increasing.
We met and heard of so many married couples who have tried for years to concieve and are still unsuccessful.
May ALLAH bless them with children soon.
MyBudakTapai and I tried for less than a year before we received the extremely good news.
I was glad we decided to keep it a secret for the first few weeks of my pregnancy.
It felt wonderful sharing the secret with the one person whom you love and trust.
When my pregnancy reached its 2nd month, we decided to spread the news to our families and the rest is history.
The period when we were trying to conceive was pretty challenging for both of us.
I was constantly emotional and negative and the failed pregnancy test results did nothing to uplift my spirits.
Though it was just as difficult for him, MyBudakTapai was always patient and never failed to remind me to have faith in The Almighty.
I think that was what got us through.
Having faith in Our Creator was what got us out of the rut and saved our relationship.
Alhamdullillah.
So will we survive parenthood and raise religious and good-natured children?
Insya ALLAH.
We will definitely try and hope for the very best.
ALLAH will not let those who tried be by themselves - that I'm sure of.
Friday, March 25, 2011
Oh what a night!
Yesterday was by far, the most challenging.
Fayrah would not go to sleep and cried each time we place her back in her cot - which was strange because she is never like that.
She does still wake up each night for feeds but would go to sleep almost immediately after that.
But yesterday night was different and I am ashamed to admit that the change did not bring out the best in me.
The only way they communicate is by crying.
I have to say that I am still having to remind myself that crying is Fayrah's only way of communication.
I wish I can look this good when stressed.
Fayrah would not go to sleep and cried each time we place her back in her cot - which was strange because she is never like that.
She does still wake up each night for feeds but would go to sleep almost immediately after that.
But yesterday night was different and I am ashamed to admit that the change did not bring out the best in me.
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| From Discover My space... |
I have to say that I am still having to remind myself that crying is Fayrah's only way of communication.
Babies cries can be pretty stressing because adults associate crying with negativity and stress.
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| From Discover My space... |
I felt so guilty and embarrassed at how I handled the situation.
One thing I hope to improve about myself is to be more patient - especially with Fayrah.
MyBudakTapai ever mentioned that I would have no problem being a mum because I am constantly around children.
Hah! What a joke!
To tell you the truth, I think he is doing a MUCH better job at being a parent than I am.
Being a teacher and a mother are two VERY different things!
But I am up for the challenge.
Bring it on, bebeh!
Because isn't...
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| From Discover My space... |
Thursday, March 10, 2011
It does pay to be patient.
4 years ago, my ultimate wish was to get married.
Back then, I did not think that I could even find anyone who was willing to accept me for all that I am.
Then, MyBudakTapai came along.
Alhamdullillah.
When we got serious, we started talking about marriage.
When we got engaged, our wedding date seemed so far in the distant that it was almost unreachable - to me, at least.
Amidst all the wedding preparations, financial planning and searching for a house, I did not realise that all challenges were preparing us for marriage life.
The trials and tribulations we went through taught us to trust each other and in ALLAH s.w.t and also, to block out any other opinions that may not know for certain what we were really going through at that point of time.
Now that we are married, communication is more important than ever.
Getting used to living together after getting the "Halal" certificate from the Kadi, was well....interesting.
Though I absolutely loved the fact that I sleep and wake up to MyBudakTapai, there were other things that needed getting used to.
To be specific, it took us a while to get used to sharing the space and our house.
Hehehehe....Sharing is caring.
Now that we have passed that (Alhamdullillah), we will need to get used to sharing the space with another member of the family.
Insya ALLAH.
To be honest, MyBudakTapai and I are pretty scared of what's to come.
However, we are also excited and very thankful for this opportunity.
Each time BamBim kicks or moves, we feel more and more happy and blessed - I could even get emotional at times.
Not a crybaby, it's just the hormones. :P
Therefore, I pray to ALLAH s.w.t that I will continue to experience a healthy and beautiful pregnancy and BamBim will be born a healthy, adorable, intelligent, well-mannered and religious child (Am I kiasu or what, huh?).
Insya ALLAH.
Now, that is all I am hoping for.
Back then, I did not think that I could even find anyone who was willing to accept me for all that I am.
Then, MyBudakTapai came along.
Alhamdullillah.
When we got serious, we started talking about marriage.
When we got engaged, our wedding date seemed so far in the distant that it was almost unreachable - to me, at least.
Amidst all the wedding preparations, financial planning and searching for a house, I did not realise that all challenges were preparing us for marriage life.
The trials and tribulations we went through taught us to trust each other and in ALLAH s.w.t and also, to block out any other opinions that may not know for certain what we were really going through at that point of time.
Now that we are married, communication is more important than ever.
Getting used to living together after getting the "Halal" certificate from the Kadi, was well....interesting.
Though I absolutely loved the fact that I sleep and wake up to MyBudakTapai, there were other things that needed getting used to.
To be specific, it took us a while to get used to sharing the space and our house.
Hehehehe....Sharing is caring.
Now that we have passed that (Alhamdullillah), we will need to get used to sharing the space with another member of the family.
Insya ALLAH.
To be honest, MyBudakTapai and I are pretty scared of what's to come.
However, we are also excited and very thankful for this opportunity.
Each time BamBim kicks or moves, we feel more and more happy and blessed - I could even get emotional at times.
Not a crybaby, it's just the hormones. :P
Therefore, I pray to ALLAH s.w.t that I will continue to experience a healthy and beautiful pregnancy and BamBim will be born a healthy, adorable, intelligent, well-mannered and religious child (Am I kiasu or what, huh?).
Insya ALLAH.
Now, that is all I am hoping for.
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